51/365 MSN vs. school server

"I'm not sure MSN is our best choice," I put my fencing foil into the fray. Sr. Fern looks puzzled. What she knows about the internet can fit in a teacup. I'm not IT professional, but I am married to one. Joey is sitting across the table from me, seething. The other teachers know they're being taken along for a ride where they are only unwilling passengers. Like a carpool.

"Why not?" Sr. Fern asks.

"What sort of controls are available? I don't want to send my class into the computer room and be able to send emails to anyone about anything. Not on school time."

"Look," Joey interrupts, "It's not like these kids don't have computer access at the library, at home, all the time. They are going to do what they want to do!"

"But maybe not here," Sr. Fern says sternly. "I don't want a parent coming to me with evidence of harassment or something like that. What do you suggest?" she turns back to me. I'm ready.

"I've researched a number of email programs for schools that would be appropriate. They're free, they're completely monitored, and we can restrict them in all sorts of ways."

"But the anonymous donor really wanted to go with msn," Joey protests.

"Does msn have the capabilites I think we need?" Fern counters directly. "No? Then I think the donor will understand."

Joey stares at me, not happy. Seething, in fact. But Sr. Fern is happy and I've chalked up a stroke in the win column. "Why don't you and Joey meet after school tomorrow and set that up?"

In the computer room after school, suddenly we're best friends. Joey gets me on a computer and I find my way to the webpage.

"You know, I only picked msn because that's what we use at home," she explains.

"Sure," I say with a nod, clicking on the sign up key.

"I just, I wish you could be more appreciative of my work here."

That makes me look up.

"I've laid out a lot of money to make this work," she continues. "And I hate that you stomp all over that."

"You're the donor," I say, not a question.

"Of course I am."

This doesn't make me like her more.

"And I'm here almost every day trying to get all this to work and did you know I have rheumatoid arthritis? I'm trying to get pregnant and nothing is working and the medication I'm on I'll have to go off and this is just one more thing," she shakes her head.

I mentally erase the mark in the win column, but I don't back down on the internet usage in the school. There is common sense here, not just meanness. But I try to back down on the other stuff. For now.