136/365 Rabbit Song

Gonna waste some time with you
and let this world go
Keep my heart idle
--Hem

We arrange plants. And then, because one must check the arrangement from where the people sit to be sure it's done right, Kinnera goes and sits in the front pew. Hildegard sits on the opposite side from her. I put something away in the sacristy and sit myself down on the top step, leaning on the marble communion rail.

Ah, the communion rail. So much kerfuffle over a piece of architecture. I might be one of the few people in the parish who doesn't have an opinion. We could leave it there and make the church look like it always has (except NOT, since it's changed and evolved over time anyway), or we could take it out and make the worship space more up to date. I don't care. I've never felt like it was a barrier because I'm a post-Vatican II baby and I never knelt at it. I've never felt barred from the sanctuary. So it doesn't bother me. But neither does it seem like the church would be scarred and broken if we took it out (unless of course we did a bad job at it...).

Anyway, just an aside.

I sat there and Kinnera told a story from lunch. Lunch at the parish where she works sounds like fun. Hildegard told a story of being trapped on Mustang Island in a car that wouldn't start. It's longer than that (obviously) and I just wanted her to keep telling it. Keep talking and chatting and I won't have to go home yet. Not that home is the problem. Anywhere but this moment is the problem. I want to sit leaning against this cool marble and listen to you chat and not think about anything outside this moment.

It wasn't anything important, the moment. We weren't making decisions or discussing deep topics. We were being idle. Putting off the next things--for me, girls' bedtimes and housecleaning. Just being there.

When I left, driving down Grand towards home, I realized how much I used to do that. Linger, chat, be. And I wondered what happened to make that so rare. Leo's birth? One too many obligations? Too much Irish dance? I don't know. It was a nice moment. I need to do it more.